This week has been full of ups and downs.
We started out the week well! Monday was a good day and it made me feel like I am in the right place and that my students like me and even like I was a good teacher sometimes. It's incredible how quickly that can all change! I also learned this week that it isn't about getting students to like you, it is about loving them regardless of what they call you, say to you, or how much they try to get you upset and mad.
A couple weeks ago, my cooperating teacher was named Teacher of the Year for all of Calumet City. She honestly is the best teacher and I am so glad that I can get to learn from her. I was talking to her about why I sometimes cannot control the kids and she said that she was in that same boat all of last year. You just have to keep loving them, keep being strict, and keep them engaged. If there is down time, that is where the students lose it. She taught about half of the class last year in fourth grade, so they know what to expect from her and how she runs things. It is tough coming in sometimes because the kids are so used to her style of teaching. A lot of the time it is ok, but whenever she leaves the room they all get a lot of attitude and try to make me mad. (That is the thing to do apparently: "You mad Miss Schaap??") This is quite the challenge, and it does not happen all the time, but there is a sub for 4 weeks across the hall and my teacher needs to go help her sometimes too. It's those times when it is the worst and most difficult.
Wednesday was one of the worst days I have ever had in a school. After lunch we came back and my teacher was dealing with a different situation in another classroom. She asked me to take the kids to the bathroom like we do every day. I did, and it was pretty normal until one student fell by the water fountain. I watched him, and he did not really fall, just kind of slid down the wall. He was very dramatic about it and everyone burst out laughing. This then turned into him yelling at everyone and trying to say somebody pushed him and I did not know what to do. I tried for about two minutes to help him and get everybody else under control but it just continued to escalate. I quickly found my cooperating teacher and said, "Please help me!" She came out and as soon as the kids saw her they snapped back into shape. Sometimes you just need the extra back up. It was a little scary and I was not sure if there was going to be a fight or what. Thankfully there was not. Later that afternoon there was a fight in another class in the bathrooms and 5 of the boys got suspended for two weeks. It is getting a little tense in 5th grade lately!
I think that the next couple weeks will be really tough and sometimes you just have to do what you have to do to get through the day and through the lessons you plan. It was a little disappointing because I had spent a long time preparing lessons for Wednesday afternoon, and they spent an hour and a half with their heads down and writing apology letters to me and my teacher. This seemed to shape them up, but it is still unfortunate that we cannot use that time for instruction.
This week brought on so many more challenges, but it is such good teaching experience. Sometimes you need backup, sometimes taking time to think about actions is more important than finding antonyms and dividing by two digit divisors. I guess it really takes me back to the reason that I want to be a teacher: to help kids. I want to help them and show them Jesus in any way I can. I hope that my kids can see that and I will just keep praying for them every morning during morning work. Anything is possible, and I'm praying for a good week this upcoming week :)
Every situation is a learning opportunity....not always what you planned though! Hang in there. :)
ReplyDeleteHannah,
ReplyDeleteI am impressed by your ability to recognize the big picture and to trust in the divine plan more than your own plan. In reading of your experiences, I was struck by the image of students who needed to learn a lesson that was more important than academics that day. How often does our Great Teacher need to take this approach with us? Until we learn fundamental lessons, we cannot move on to "the plan". As your cooperating teacher said, just keep loving them, keep being strict, and keep them engaged. So, you have a good example both in the way that God teaches us as well as the modeling of your Teacher of the Year cooperating teacher.
Don't forget to find something each day that brings joy. As you "keep loving them, keep being strict, and keep them engaged", you need to focus on something positive to keep your own spirits up.
Have a great week!
Hannah,
ReplyDeleteI love how you are thinking about what's really important here. I'm pleased that your faith is coming to the fore again at times of trials.
I loved the encouragement Mrs. Moses gave you. I'd like to further add that I believe your students are actually asking you to take control. Although they know how to behave, they want you to tell them your expectations. They want to know that you care enough to be fair and have clear consequences for their choice not be have. You can show your disappointment. You might even be unhappy. However, know that in spite of what they do, you need to love them. Loving them means giving them clear limits. When they choose to set outside those limits, then you need to quickly give a consequence. You can do this.
One thing I hope you heard one of your peers say in class on Monday is: "if they aren't engaged, they will misbehave. You need to plan detailed plans. Know what is going to happen when. You need to run that class like a well-oiled machine.
The last thing you should worry about is whether they like you. All you need to like you are your friends and your boyfriend and family. These kids will like you if you are fair, give them clear consistent boundaries, and challenge them to learn. And oh, by the way, have fun. It is not going to be easy, but I know you are up for the task.
I'll be praying.
Dr. Meyer